I guess we can come out now
After the 2004 election it was pretty gloomy around the old bunker. You try living without sunshine and fresh air for months at a time and see if it doesn't affect your outlook. Besides, things were getting pretty desperate: we were reduced to drinking California Merlot (shudder!) and Becky Sue was getting a little hairy for my tastes. I'm sorry but there is NO WAY I'm waxing anything but my surfboard (which is doing me little good down here let me tell you.)
So anyway, we read on the Internet that the Bush Administration was melting down because of some indictments or something and that next Tuesday some people are planning to run the Bush Adminstration out of town. Wow. I mean Becky Sue got out some of our old Jefferson Airplane/Starship LPs and we marched around the bunker shouting some old sixties slogans: Hell no we won't go. Hey, Hey LBJ, how many kids did you kill today. The whole world is watching. The whole world is watching - gosh we had such fun! We started watching some of our old Watergate Senate hearing tapes but we both fell asleep. Afterwards we acted out a play we wrote last February we call "John and Mo Dean - Nixon's cruelest revenge". (We always fight over whose turn it is to wear the blonde wig.)
It will be good again to breathe the sweet pure air of Democracy again. To tell you the truth we both were more than a little worried that America had turned to the radical right for good. But you know, you just got to have a little faith. Like Lincoln (a Republican, we should point out) once was reported to say: "you can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time but Dick Chaney isn't fooling anybody any of the time." In fact, we heard that even Anne Coulter carries around a bottle of hand-sanitizer when she knows she's going to have to press the flesh with Chaney. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA But, you have to forgive us; we've been living on pimiento cheese sandwiches, non-vintage wine and "The Daily Show" since 2002 so we're a little left of center.
So if you see us on Tate Street give us a grin and a wave. I hope my graduate students eventually forgive my sudden absence but, kids, if truth be known, I haven't read a paper all the way through since 1987. Besides, see how well you've done without me? Believe me, you can't get that kind of education in anybody's classroom. (Becky Sue says to speak for myself).
It's good to know that we won't be the last of the Liberals. That there is a place for righteousness and truth in this country and that at this very moment all around this great nation of ours, millions of people are sloughing off their lethargy and taking back their country from our would-be oppressors. We're tired of being scared of the future. We believe there's hope for the future. Now fix me a decent Mojito and let's celebrate!
Gosh, I hope the Volvo still starts.